Role Reversal - When Adult Children Should Talk To Parents About Money

Getting Started

When you decide the time is right to discuss financial needs and priorities with your parents, be clear about your intentions, but also let them know that you are not trying to pry and that you respect their privacy.

An initial conversation should be done one-on-one. Involving too many people can be overwhelming and appear threatening. If you would prefer not to take the lead and have siblings, select one - perhaps the oldest, most financially knowledgeable or one with whom your parents may feel most comfortable.

Remember throughout the process to be sensitive to your parents' feelings. To some extent, our financial lives influence how we view ourselves as independent human beings. For many, old age is a time of coping with a series of physical and emotional losses: hearing, eyesight, mobility, memory, as well as friendships. With any discussion of money, be sensitive to the fears and concerns your parents may harbor about their possible loss of control or independence.

Household Finances

Maybe you have already spoken with your parents about their handling of regular household finances, but haven't brought the subject up in a while. If you think that they might appreciate your concern, then it may be a good idea to check in again. Determine whether they are staying on top of their household finances. Are bills getting paid on time? Are investments being monitored?

Also, ask about their use of banking technologies, such as automatic teller machines, direct deposit and automatic bill paying. For instance, more than 80% of Social Security recipients use direct deposit for their benefits checks. Conveniences such as this can simplify money management for older individuals and provide a sense of security and control over day-to-day financial affairs.

Estate Planning

Estate planning is the key to making sure that everything you have worked for in life is passed on according to your wishes. An estate plan can be as simple as maintaining an up-to-date will, or it can be expanded to include other planning mechanisms such as trusts for passing assets to children and managing taxes. Estate plans may also include other legal arrangements, such as a power of attorney and health care proxy.

A power of attorney is a legal document that designates an individual to make financial or legal decisions on behalf of another individual. A health care proxy is a legal document in which an individual designates another person to make health care decisions if he or she is rendered incapable of making their wishes known. The health care proxy has, in essence, the same rights to request or refuse treatment that the individual would have if capable of making and communicating decisions. Together, these documents can be very important should a parent become ill or incapacitated.

Health Care Resources

One of the biggest worries of elder Americans and their adult children is paying for the cost of long-term care, should it be needed. If your parents are healthy seniors who can look after themselves, they generally are eligible to enter a continuing-care retirement community that allows them to buy or rent an apartment and ensures them lifetime nursing care when it is necessary. Another option for healthy seniors is private long-term happinesslifetime.com care insurance, which can help cover nursing-home costs or the cost of an in-home aide.

Should you or your parents consider buying a long-term happinesslifetime.com care insurance policy? According to current data, the average annual cost of nursing home care is now nearly $75,000 - well in excess of the average household income.* Also, keep in mind that the government provides limited financial assistance for families paying for nursing home care. Medicare will only pay for care on a short-term basis, and Medicaid is reserved for low-income individuals with limited assets. For that reason, long-term happinesslifetime.com care insurance may be a prudent addition to your parents' - or your own - financial plan.

A Gradual Process

Working out a financial plan for your parents' elder years should be a gradual process that unfolds over time. Don't wait until a crisis develops to start the dialogue or try to resolve all details in one meeting. Raise questions that your parents can consider for a follow-up conversation. After several informal conversations, you may want to consider the help of a financial professional.

For Your Information

There are many organizations that provide valuable information and referrals. In addition to the resources listed below, check your local library or senior services agency for other online support services, publications and resources.

The National Council on Aging (ncoa.org)

A nonprofit organization that helps older people remain healthy and independent, find jobs, increase access to benefits programs and discover meaningful ways to continue contributing to society.

AARP (aarp.org)

A nonprofit organization focused on enhancing the quality of life for Americans over the age of 50. The AARP offers a multitude of products and services to address health care, travel and leisure and financial issues for its 38+ million members.

Administration on Aging (aoa.gov)

An advocate agency of the federal government, the AOA offers a variety of print and online materials for elders, their families and professionals regarding housing, medical, caregiving and services for seniors.

ElderWeb (elderweb.com)

A rich collection of online resources for the elderly and their caregivers on financial matters, health care, living arrangements and social, mental and legal issues.

*AARP Bulletin, March 16, 2007

This article is not intended to provide specific investment or tax advice for any individual. Consult your financial advisor, your tax advisor or me if you have any question

How To Make A Complaint About An Estate Agent

While many estate agents are honest, hard working and will provide an excellent service when it comes to buying or selling your home, there are a few that give the rest a very bad name.

That's why the whole industry has a bad reputation, especially in the United Kingdom. Fortunately for house buyers and house sellers there are several ways to try and ensure you use a reputable agent and several ways in which you can complain should you be unfortunate enough to fall foul of one of the 'bad guys'.

Ways To Choose A Good Agent

There are a few things you can do and look for when choosing the agent you want, either as a buyer or seller.

One of the first things you can do is speak to people you know who have recently bought or sold a home and see who they used and whether or not they were happy with the service they received. Try to use a local agent too - if you're buying in Manchester, use a Manchester estate agent. They'll know the market better but they will, hopefully, have also built up a good reputation with local people.

Secondly, always check that the agent belongs to an approved redress scheme. Anyone operating under the Estate Agents Act 1979 must belong to such a scheme. There are two schemes, one from The Property Ombudsman (TPO) and one from the Surveyors Ombudsman Service (SOS).

Members of the TPO have to display the TPO logo and provide the TPO consumer guide to customers. Members of the SOS should provide you with a copy of their complaints handling procedure.

You could also check to see if the estate agent belongs to the National Association of Estate Agents, which has over 10,000 members, all of which must adhere to a strict code of conduct.

You should also read any contract very carefully before you sign and appoint an agent to sell your home. It will detail the fee you will pay on completion but also the length of time you're signed up with the agent. A reasonable amount of time for the agent to sell your home should be given, but be wary of contracts that tie you to an estate agent for a very long time.

Unfortunate Enough To Need To Complain? Here's How

If you're unlucky enough to have had a bad experience with an agent and you need to make a complaint then the first place you should start is wit the agency themselves.

Make a written, formal complaint detailing why you are complaining and what you would like done about it. If the estate agent is reputable they will do everything they can to address the issue.

If, however, you remain unhappy then you can register your complaint with the TPO or SOS if they were members of their redress schemes. If not, you can also complain to the Office of Fair Trading, The National Association of Estate Agents, the Guild of Estate Agents or the Royal Institute of Chartered Surveyors, depending on your type of complaint and who the agent is a member of.

Your complaint must come under the Estate Agents Act 1979, however, which doesn't cover things like gazumping, valuations and contractual matters, so be aware of this.

Ian Grainger is writing on behalf of Shepherd Gilmour, shepherdgilmour.com/default3.aspx Manchester estate agents.

How To Cope With Caregiver Syndrome

Yes. It is a real ailment. You can call it caregiver stress, caregiver strain or caregiver syndrome. But whatever the name, it is the feeling of hopelessness with being overcome by the burdens of caring for a loved one.

And while caregiver syndrome is best identified with diseases such as Alzheimer's Disease and Dementia, it can affect any caregiver who is living with the 24/7 demands of care giving.

In addition to the emotional stress that causes exhaustion, anger and feelings of hopelessness, caregiver syndrome can take a physical effect on the care giver as well.

The reason for this is clear. The caregiver not only has their parent to take care of but their spouse and children as well. And with the lack of time they stop taking care of themselves. They stop exercising. They stop eating right. And the resulting weight gain combined with the stress of the situation means that caregivers live on average 5-7 years less than the rest of the population.

So, how does a care giver go about getting the support they need?

First, it's time for the family meeting. In most families, one person is handling most or all of the care giving. So when you get together with your siblings you need to admit to them that you are not a superhero and need help in the care giving. Delegate responsibilities and find out who can come over to be a respite caregiver for a few hours or a weekend so that you can have a life.

This will work in MOST circumstances. However, if your siblings are at a distance or the un-cooperative sibling, then you have a different situation to deal with. But different situations bring about different solutions. Here is what you need to do:

Arrange for a home health care aid to come and take care of your loved one
Seek government help through your local Office of the Aging
Arrange for respite care
Acknowledging that you cannot handle this anymore and making arrangements for them to live in a nursing home

Both respite care and home health happinesslifetime.com care agencies serve the same purpose. This is to bring someone in to take some of the burden off of you. The choice you make will be dependent upon economy and the services that are required by your loved one. The happinesslifetime.com home health care agency will be more expensive but will probably offer more in-depth services as well as licensed individuals.

Next, reach to the local Office of Senior Services or Office of the Aging. The services can vary from county-to-county but you can get an idea of the freeseniorcitizenssolutions.com/grants-for-senior-citizens.html grants available for senior citizens here.

Warm Regards,
Tony Rovere
family-caregiver-support.com family-caregiver-support.com

Reverse Mortgages Help Seniors Keep Their Home Or Purchase A New Home

For many seniors, home equity is roughly 30-40 percent of their net worth. They are house poor often times and don't have the available funds to make repairs. If you and your spouse are both at least 62 years of age and have significant equity in your home, a reverse mortgage can turn that equity into tax-free cash without forcing you to move or make a monthly payment. YOU DON'T NEED A JOB AND YOU DON'T NEED CREDIT! Age and equity are the only qualifying factors.

A reverse mortgage can be a worthwhile financial tool if used correctly. At the same time, you could make some serious mistakes with your financial future. For example, you don't want to take your equity and run down to the casino.

A reverse mortgage gets its name because of the way it works. Instead of the borrower making payments to the lender, the lender releases equity to the borrower in a number of forms:

· A lump sum cash payment;

· A monthly cash payment;

· A line of credit (which tends to be the most popular option);

o Some combination of the above.

When the owner dies or moves away, the house can be sold, the loan paid off and any leftover equity value can go to the living owner or the designated heirs. Heirs don't have to sell the house. They can either pay off the reverse mortgage with their own funds or refinance the outstanding loan balance within six months with the option of two 90-day extensions that must be applied for. Unfortunately, heirs often discourage people from getting a reverse mortgage because they are afraid of losing their inheritance.

There are three basic types of reverse mortgages:

· Single-purpose reverse mortgages, which are offered by some state and local government agencies and nonprofit organizations;

· Home Equity Conversion Mortgages (HECMs) are federally insured reversed mortgages backed by the U. S. Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD);

o Proprietary reverse mortgages are private loans that cover home values usually over $600,000.

Some loans are conventional loans, some are proprietary loans held by certain lenders and some are insured by FHA.

The size of a reverse mortgage is determined by the borrower's age, the interest rate and the home's value. The older a borrower, the more they can borrow, but the amounts are capped by the maximum FHA loan limit for each city and county. The amounts vary from $200,160 in rural areas to $362,790 in many major metropolitan areas. In Alaska, Guam, Hawaii and the U.S. Virgin Islands, the FHA mortgage limits can be adjusted up to 150 percent of the ceiling based on the area. If the FHA modernization Act is passed, it is possible that the FHA loan limit will be raised. This would be great, since it seems that FHA is the greeneasylife.com mortgage loan that generally gives more equity to the senior.

Reverse mortgages have traditionally been chosen by older Americans who can't cover everyday living expenses or who otherwise need cash for such things as long-term care premiums, home health care services, home improvements or to pay off their current mortgage or credit cards greater than their income can support. More recently, though, they've become popular with individuals who see them as a better alternative to home equity lines. Some use the proceeds to supplement monthly income, buy a car, fund travel and second homes. Evaluate with the help of a financial adviser if reverse mortgage funds can be used to restructure estate taxes.

You will have to consult with a financial planner before you're granted this loan - that's one of the requirements. This step can be completed within the first few days of the process. The basic loan closing now takes place in about 30-40 days from the date of application. Generally the only out-of-pocket cost is an appraisal fee ranging from $300- $500. There is required counseling to make sure that you are making the right decision for you.

Here are other things to consider-some of these are risks:

Cost: Reverse mortgages are generally more expensive than traditional mortgages in terms of origination fees, closing costs and other charges. The basic FHA-backed HECM loan finances these fees into the initial loan balance, and they can run between $12,000 and $18,000. The loans are based on anticipated home value appreciation of four percent a year, so if the housing market is healthy, those costs are generally recovered in a short period of time. But if the housing market sours, it will definitely take longer to recoup those fees.

You'll need to make sure you're not endangering your federal retirement benefits: The basic FHA HECM is designed as tax-free income to the senior receiving their Social Security income. However, if your total liquid assets exceed allowable limits under federal guidelines, you might endanger your benefits. This is another critical reason to work with a financial planner on this decision.

Rates: Reverse mortgages have rates that are typically higher than those charged on conventional mortgages. Interest is charged on the outstanding balance and added to the amount you owe each month. Again, check the total annual loan cost.

Your mortgage can be called due and payable: The homeowner or estate always retains title to the home, but if you fail to pay your property taxes, adequately maintain your home, pay your insurance premiums, or change your primary residence, the lender can declare the mortgage due or reduce the amount of monthly cash advances to pay those overdue amounts.

Did you know that you can actually use a reverse mortage to buy a house? How do you do it? Let's take an example: maybe you sell you are a senior that sells their home and nets 300K. Next they can go buy a new home for about 500K, by putting down 300K, and financing the other 200K with a reverse mortgage. Maybe a senior would like to move from their older house of many years to a new condo or loft. This would be a great way to do it.

Talk to your kids as their ignorance of this product may cause them to give you bad advice. If your house is your major asset, getting involved in a reverse mortgage may not leave much to the next generation - if it appreciates, there may be some difference that the kids can have. That's why that in addition to discussing a reverse mortgage with a financial adviser, seniors need to talk with their family.

John Mazzara CFP CLU CHFC CEBS CMB MBA MS is an independent financial planner in the Twin Cities, MN. Officing out of Edina, Minnesota-John is centrally located within the 7 county metropolitan area. John owns three separate businesses-a licensed real estate broker associate since 1986-affiliated with RE/MAX Associates Plus selling.mn selling.mn an independent CFP-certified financial planner since 1989 with an independent financial planning firm-Financial Planning Associates investmentadviser.com investmentadviser.com and the owner of a mortgage brokerage firm-Venture Development Inc-specializing ins residential, commercial and investment mortgages ventureloanapp.com ventureloanapp.com John has a wealth of knowledge and experience that surpasses most other advisors. If you are looking for someone to help you in the areas of real estate sales/purchase, mortgages, or and/or financial planning and insurance you should call John for a free 1 hour consultation to see if he can meet your needs. 952-929-2577.

Finding the Perfect Care Home For Mom

I know how badly you feel. You're telling yourself you're a bad daughter -- though you aren't. You feel you're failing your Mom, though you know she needs more care than you can manage.

And, you know what, she needs more care than the family can give. And that is the big issue. Not your guilt. Not your sense of failing your very own Mom. It's the answer to the very simple question: does Mom need more care than one person can give?

And, let me remind you, that one person must be able to get a night's sleep, to have time to herself, to be able to go out of the house, knowing Mom will be safe alone.

So, how do you find a good place? There are two ways to go -- do all the research yourself, get some expert help. Elder care placement agencies can do this job wonderfulyl well, as can care managers or other professionals in the field. their service is often free, paid for by the successful placements they make.

These folks know the local resources, know good homes when they see them, know their field and will want you to have what you want for your Mom. Ask them to refer you to some of their happy clients, although these days, most have such testimonials on their websites.

If you decide to do it for yourself, get a listing of local care home and assisted livings in your area from your local senior services or Area Agency on Aging. Go to a local support group for caregivers, even your local Alzheimer's Association support group because these guys know who the good guys are in your local care homes. They'll warn you off and tell you who's good. Even then, continue your own research.

Five Ways to Spot a Good Care Home:

1. It's bright, clean and interesting, with plants, pets and warm-hearted staff;

2. The food looks so good you want to sit right down and eat it;

3. Each room is individually furnished from the resident's own home;

4. Activities are interesting and appropriate -- and, sorry, bingo and manicures are NOT activities;

5. The last inspection report has no major alarm issues.

Trust your instincts. It must feel good to you. Ask yourself, would my Mom fit in here and be okay? Do these people seem as if they'd value her and cherish her wisely. Could they make laugh, help her feel safe and let her also be herself? Each of those would be a very big yes.

Just because your Mom moves into a care home doesn't mean she can't come home to your house. You can bring her home any time you want to -- no-one can stop you. You can take her out for lunch or to her own hairdresser. She can come home for festival times. You'll know she's doing well in her care home when she tired of your company and says, "I've got to get home now."

And maybe you'd be surprised how often elders in care do say that. You see, old people know what maybe you don't. That life isn't always what you want but you get on with it anyway. That's the wisdom of age.

Frena Gray-Davidson, Alzheimer's caregiver and author of five caregiving books, including her latest book "Alzheimer's 911: Hope, Help and Healing for Caregivers", available at amazon.com amazon.com. Frena teaches care families and professionals to decode the language of dementia and achieve successful behavior interventions. Go to her website at alzguide.com alzguide.com/ and sign up for her free monthly online newsletter for all involved in dementia care. Email her at

How to Choose a Florida Vacation Rental

I've owned a villa near Disney for many years and having rented it form time to time, we came to realize from chatting with our guests that one of their biggest challenges is how to choose the vacation rental villa that is right for them in the first place! This article reflects their experience and hopefully sharing it with you will make your choice easier...

Is a vacation rental villa right for me?

Whether you are seeking a magical Disney World Vacation or an active family holiday, a Florida vacation rental villa is one of the most flexible options available to you. Many visitors decide on a hotel or motel room. This can appear to be the cheapest option but has several disadvantages. As I'm sure you know if you wanted a suit of rooms in a hotel that offered all the facilities of a vacation rental villas, you would spend many hundreds of dollars per night! Limited space, limited bathrooms, neighbor noise etc - we've all been there! The convenience and space of a vacation rental villa not only make for a much more enjoyable vacation for everyone but when things go wrong these were an important factor for one of our guests when 3 of her 4 children became ill shortly after arriving. She was so pleased to have chosen a luxury vacation rental villa with the space and convenience of 5 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms as it meant that the whole family was not wakened when one member had to get up frequently during the night!

Convenience: Probably the biggest advantage of your vacation rental - you can come and go as you please and do what you like, when you like. You might feel like a day by the pool on your own when the rest of the family go out, and that's exactly what you can have - moreover, its you by the pool and no one else to share it with - bliss!

Location:

This is the another important one factor in choosing your vacation rental! Its important to choose a luxury vacation rental villa that is close to the attractions that you will be visiting frequently. First time visitors have little idea of the scale of the Orlando area and the whole thing can be more than a little daunting. Its made even more confusing by the vast choice of vacation rental villas available and the lack of clear details on their location. We know that this has resulted in some families traveling long distances to get from their chosen location - not ideal. That's why we have clear links to maps from our vacation rental villa details pages. We want you to be able to plan your vacation and spend as little time as possible in the car!

Quality:

We spent some time recently viewing and inspecting Florida vacation rental villas. The pictures on their web sites presented the villa very well in most cases but it soon became clear that they had been taken a very long time ago. Many of the villas were very tired, showed heavy wear and little attention to maintaining a comfortable environment for their guests. They were certainly far form the luxury vacation rental villas they were being marketed as!

These problems showed up much more in the properties where the owners had clearly taken little interest and were managed by property management agencies (Large or small, and who, in turn rent them to the large holiday companies). This is one reason why we update the pictures of our properties each year (several times a year in fact!). This gives our guests the confidence to know that what they see is what they will get. Whilst booking direct with the owner does not guarantee quality, it does give you the opportunity to ask if the photos on the site truly represent the condition of a particular vacation rental villa today.

Check in/out:

This is often overlooked as one of these things that has to be done but be careful. Check in and out is not usually at the villa! Its normally at the management company office where you have to wait in line with everyone else that booked through the same company. This means that you have to drive to and find the office from the airport. We know of offices that are over 15 miles from the vacation rental. Check the driving distances and times from airport to office and from office to your villa. (Be aware that if the office is in Kissimmee, it can be very busy and take a long time especially in the early evening). Note: We have an electronic access system so our guests can drive direct to their chosen luxury villa and let themselves in. The benefit of this system is clear - and you have no keys to lose or hand back.

Locality:

What we mean here is the area surrounding the villa. Careful examination of the photos of some villas will show where they have been doctored to hide undesirable features. One of the favorites is to block out the lower areas of screened pool enclosures to hide the fact that there are many others very close to the villa. We do not enhance our photos. Check carefully or ask if the pool area is overlooked.

Games rooms:

Some vacation rental villas advertise a games room with all kinds of entertainments. If this is something that you want to have in your villa, be sure to inquire whether it is properly air conditioned. The reason for this is that some owners have simply locked the garage door and installed a carpet and a pool table or foosball table and called it a games room. Its fine in December but impossible to use comfortably for much of the year.

Equipment:

Check whether the equipment you need is 'included' or 'available' and know the difference between these terms. Included usually means that the item is included in the rent for the villa. Its important to know that 'available' usually means that the item is available but you will be expected to pay an extra charge for it. For example, a gas barbecue will cost you between $35 and $50 per week to hire (+ sales tax). A cot, baby seat or stroller can be the same each! That can make a significant unexpected dent in your pocket - check unless the information is explicit!

Summary:

We hope that this guide helps you make your choice of vacation rental villa much easier. We think that vacation rental villas are exceptional value for money but there are some traps which we have highlighted. Whilst we realize that checking all these details might be a pain, we hope that it will help you have a much better vacation!

John and Julie Macrae have been involved in real estate investment in the UK and the USA for many years. Julie owns a chain of Estate Agents and property management agencies in the UK, John is involved in property management and overseas real estate sales.

Take a look at our more-vacation-rentals.com/florida/vacation-rentals Orlando vacation rental homes and more-vacation-rentals.com/florida/florida-villas Florida Villas!